REVIEW: Helicopter Man Pounds Dinosaur Billionaire Ass by Chuck Tingle

John Hams is a man who has lost it all, a nine-to-five nobody with an addiction to billionaire dinosaur bad boys. That is, until a freak accident at work imbues John with the ability to transform into an achingly handsome helicopter at will. Suddenly, things are looking up, as John uses his ability to woo the dashing stegosaurus from his addicts group who just happens to have a thing for rugged aircrafts. But it’s not long before John’s new helicopter identity starts to spin out of control, taking on a personality of its own as the wild and horny, Chibs Pratt, chopper with abs.

Warnings: Dubcon, Body Horror (maybe?)

Category: M/M

Helicopter Man Pounds Dinosaur Billionaire Ass is a ludicrously silly erotic parody novel. Since I’ve been aiming to become what one might call ‘well read’ on the subject of kink and erotic literature, it seemed like it would be a gross oversight not to read at least one book by Chuck Tingle. Of course most of Tingle’s works are short stories, but thus far he has two full length novels out, so I decided to pick up the first one. And as my first Chuck Tingle piece, it certainly did not disappoint.

Chuck Tingle’s writing is actually much, much better quality than one would ever have guessed from such ridiculous comedy fare. I was impressed with the prose, and it’s very clear that Tingle more than knows how to write. The story, as silly and ludicrous as it is, is actually quite fun and engaging; it moves quickly and it gets the reader instantly interested. Why is John in an addicts anonymous group? What work does he do for the top secret Buttcorp? How will he woo the heart of the handsome dinosaur billionaire? Will he be able to evade the government once it comes to light that he’s become a helicopter shapeshifter? These quickly developing dilemmas and more keep the reader laughing and engaged.

Let’s be honest, the point of these books is not necessarily to be emotionally attached to the characters. That said, Tingle does a fantastic job of doing what is more the point of these books; making the reader laugh as these characters move through the rather ridiculous plot. John Hams isn’t the most likeable guy (okay, he’s kind of an ass) but the story is so silly and his life is so surreal that it hardly matters. In fact, it was very fun just going on this absurd little adventure with him, even though he’s got little in the way of character traits that make him specifically interesting. That more or less adds to the “average Joe swept up in weird sex adventure” vibe going on with the entire thing, and I really liked it. Yorb on the other hand is a complete and total sweetheart and absolutely deserved better than John, but the plot was so silly I could hardly care.

To be perfectly honest, Chuck Tingle’s best feature is his worldbuilding, if only because the world he’s crafted for his stories is so bizarre and surreal. He’s created an entire setting that looks like our modern world but with sentient dinosaurs, mythological creatures and inanimate objects. Think of anything, and odds are there’s a sentient, fuckable version of it in the Tingleverse up to and including abstract concepts and I think that’s pretty hilariously awesome. They aren’t even humanoid renditions of those things, John literally turns into an actual realistic helicopter and that’s apparently incredibly sexy in this world. And in fact, not only are there fuckable sentient helicopters, jetplanes and dinos just… integrated into regular modern society, there’s also multiple instances of his universe and various parallel realities, and self aware inserts of himself studying the space time continuum, all of which is absolutely unnecessary for a porn parody universe setting and yet Chuck Tingle delivered it anyways, and I have to admire that kind of extra.

Well if you’re into vehicle and aircraft fucking, there’s certainly a lot here for you! If not though, the smut in this book (and in all Tingle books) is more humorous than sexy. But that actually brings up something really interesting that I noticed while I was reading it; Chuck Tingle’s prose provides a stunningly accurate representation of asexuality. Not in the characters themselves, but for the reader (unless you’re into helicopters and dinosaurs; no judgment here). There are lengthy passages describing just how sexy John considers helicopters, waxing poetic about the choppers and the cockpit and the landing skids etc. And to most readers, the humour is going to be derived from the strangeness of these passages. But from my ace point of view, these passages don’t really feel any more strange than any typical erotica passage expounding on the sexiness of human body parts. Thus the book creates an interesting window that a non-ace person could use to understand the ace experience a little, which I found absolutely charming.

Altogether this was an absolute joy to read from start to finish, a stellar piece of erotic parody. Especially as my first experience with Chuck Tingle’s works, I was not disappointed at all, it was every bit as silly and ludicrously funny as I had been hoping for, plus even better written than I expected. I’m sure I will eventually end up reading his second novel, Buttageddon: The Final Days of Pounding Ass, at some point in the near future.

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